I don’t know why I snap. Apparantly it is all I am really good at today. I feel bad when I do. I feel that I am failing as a parent. So I am feeling pressure in my head and it hurts. I mean my head always hurts, but you get used to it. I guess I shouldn’t have lifted the sink and stuff myself, as it increased the pressure. I know people offered to help but being a stubborn ass I, of course, declined any help.
The kids are hungry. I told them I will get a loaf of bread from the freezer and will make them sandwiches once it thaws out. A minute later – “I am hungry”. I say “Soon, the loaf a bread is thawing out”. This goes on and on every thirty seconds until I snap. I yell “Why can’t you listen. I said the loaf of bread is thawing out…Jesus!” Now my son has his head coverd and is cowering. I immediately appologize.
So I am now hiding out upstairs away from them because they are annoying the shit out of me today and I can’t handle their screaming, yelling and behaviour in general. I am sure they can’t handle mine either. I think my kids are going to be messed up.