Yup I am a daily chronic migraine sufferer. That means I basically have a moderate to severe headache 24/7. It really does just suck. It is not just a headache. For me I can get an aura of losing vision, dots or zig zag lines. I become even more light, noise and smell sensitive. My right eye starts to act up and vision gets all funky. My left eye and my right eye will tear. My right side gets all numb and tingly. My perception goes and my balance is also affected. I often feel sick to my stomach. The headaches range anywhere from a constant 5 until a 8. I never say ten because that on my scale would mean death. I am fortunate to be a red head so I have some freaky weird higher than normal pain tolerance. However when my head pains spikes to severe, the pressure from inside my skull always feels like it wants to blast out from my head. It gets so bad that my scalp and hair even hurt. All I want to do is sleep, but at the same time I can not sleep because it hurts so bad. So I breathe, close my eyes; try to read; try to surf the net; try to just be. For two nights, it has been that type of night. Last night I had red wine to help relax me so I could go to sleep easier. However, Friday night meant that I wait out the pain until I pass out from being tired. I have no idea how late I was up friday night, but it was long after I put toothfairy money under my son’s pillow at 1:00am.
There is no one answer to get this beast of a life killer under control. We have been struggling to find an answer for three years. There is has been much trial and error to find the right combination with the least amount of side effects. Basically I am a guinea pig. This is not a quick process. After brain surgery, I was on at least 12 different meds at one time. I was an over medicated zombie. We had no idea what was working and what was making it worse. So the neurologist and us decreased and came off of all but one medicine. Then we started adding some back in. It takes time to see if works. First you need to tirate up to a working dose. This takes time. Then you stay at a maintenance dose for at least two/three months. During this time you determine if you can live with the side effects. If not, you then tirate down and start all over again. It is not only emotionally draining as you get your hopes up that this new little pill will be the miracle drug, it is also physically draining as your body may react in weird ways such as muscle aches, pains, rashes, weight gain,fatigue, low blood pressure, fainting, dizziness, bloating, constipation, nausea, sleep disturbances, depression, anxiety and numerous other not so fun stuff. Basically you are put through the ringer. First off you do not have any pain-free or very little pain-free days and then you don’t know if what you are taking will be worse than the pain itself.
To treat this you take many different drugs from many different drug families. You change your diet, try alternative methods, take vitamins and basically try anything that will help you – even if it is a minor way. We have been trying to find a preventative that works as two found triggers other than the hydrocephalus induced were weather and hormones. I was completely out for the count for a minimun of 18 days per month but more like 22 days on average. That meant that life really just sucked poop.
We started with a variety of antidepressants because I was experiencing high anxiety. I was given Prozac – zombie to Zoloftt – manic, Amitriptyline – angry zombie, My body decided it like Pristiq.
This did not solve my headaches. I began to track my headaches to find a trigger. I tried various diets to see if they had any affect as well. My neurologist put me on a regime of vitamins. I don’t know if they have any affect at all but I continue to take as they are all good for me.
We tried calcium channel blocker Verapamil. This did not work well at all with my already low blood pressure. I could barely walk down a hallway without almost passing out. I also didn’t appreciate the dizziness.
Next we tried anti-seizure medication. There were plenty of these meds that I tried. All with not very successful. Topamax or often lovingly referred as Dopamax made me dumb as a post and my neurogenic pain went crazy. Gabapentin, pregabalin and lamotragine are the only ones that I remember.
The most successful treatment so far has been the use of Botox. It doesn’t work 100% and we have been trying to find a combo that works great. We started last year and after the first two weeks, there was a success. I was not bed ridden for most of the month, but able to get up and do stuff. Full blown migraines were not as bad. We did find a combo that did appear to work together. It was Lamotragine. I was able to get out and be active. all was going well until we hit the seven week mark where my body decided it didn’t like the drug and responded with Steven-Johnson’s Syndrome.
Since then we have tried Beta-Blockers which have been horrid. They decreased my blood pressure so much that I could barely walk up stairs. My hands and feet were so cold that they were purple and all I did was sleep. Plus they never worked really anyway.
So why the long history of drug trials and errors. Well my Botox bascially wore of at the beginning of the first week of April and my appointment to get re-shot up is May 8th. All I can say is that it has been hell. The pain has been back in full blown intensity. I am sucking at life again. I have not been to my little art studio. I was laid up in bed and thinking what could I do to end this pain. I was to the point of messaging someone for weed. But I know that the smell itself makes me sick. However, I will be bringing up that maybe there is a medical marijuana spray, pill or patch that I can try. I am also wondering if we can get a prescription to get neurofeedback so it can be potentially covered by health insurance. The only place locally that does it costs about $4,000. I am sure there are more ideas, suggestions too that I can can possibly do. I will not give in or give up! But I am hoping that the next week or two does not have crazy changing weather or winds!
Here’s to looking forward to 40 needles!